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October 31, 2012

Dia - Dua Puluh Sembilan


D
“Give me one good damn reason why Khai should go Perth alone, and leaving you behind. Adek, answer me!”

Aku yang duduk di sebelah Khai di ruang tamu setelah tiba di rumah abang Kamahl hanya menundukkan wajahku. Abang Kamahl yang duduk di hadapanku menyilangkan tangannya, menunggu jawapan dariku.

“Adek?” tanya abang Kamahl lagi.

“Abang, Khai dengan Ezra dan berbincang dah pasal...” Khai cuba untuk menjawab namun dengan pantas abang Kamahl membantah.

“Khai! Abang tanya adek.” Bentak abang Kamahl. “Are you going to answer my question?”

“Adek, adek kan sudah beritahu abang sebab kenapa adek tidak dapat pergi sama dengan Khai.”

“The same answer? The same stupid answer that you gave me saying that you want to go there on your own? Are you saying that you can’t afford to go there?”

“Yes.” Jawabku pendek.

“Adek, all of us knew that that is not a solid argument at all. You have the grades, you have place to stay over there, you have Khai next to you taking care of you, and you have the money for it.”

“Yes, I have it all, but I don’t want to rely upon Khai and the inheritance.”

“For heaven sake, using the inheritance money for your study is the best thing to do. Plus, the money won’t come from your monthly allowance, you will still be receiving the monthly allowance. Even after converting it into Australia Dollar, you still have money to survive, and you are not alone. I don’t think there were any clause in the inheritance saying that your first degree must be completed here in Malaysia.”

“There isn’t. But that doesn’t mean that it can be done that easily. I have no idea how much money left in the fund, and I am not sure whether the money will be deducted from the second part of my inheritance.”

“Then simple. Call the lawyer.”

Aku mencapai handphone ku perlahan-lahan. Nombor Mr. Darshan terpampang di skrin, namun butang call tidak ku tekan. Aku melihat kembali ke abang Kamahl. “Call.” And put on speaker phone.

Tiada apa yang boleh aku lakukan lagi selain menuruti.

“Hello.”

“Hello Mr. Darshan, it is me Ezra.”

“Yes yes Mr. Ezra, how may I help you?”

“I just have few uncertainty about the inheritance and I am wondering you could clarify it to me.”

“Ok, what is it?”

“The clause mentioned that the cost of my first degree will be paid by the money from the inheritance, right.”

“Right, and?”

“Is there any clause saying that I must completed my first degree here in Malaysia?”

“No, there isn’t. Why do you ask?”

“Let say, if I wanted to transfer my degree into a different university, abroad to be exact, will it still be covered?”

“Again like I mentioned earlier there is no particular clause mentioning that your first degree should be completed in Malaysia, and also, there is no clause with regards to transferring too. Even if you decided to quit your current course and pursuing your first degree again abroad, your fees will still be covered. So, technically, it is possible. However we need to look into the amount left inside the trust fund. Considering the exchange rate and the fees, that would be quite a large amount. But I would say it would be more than enough. Do you have any particular country in mind? The average fees for each semester?”

“How about Australia? And the cost would be around AUD 25,000 annualy.”

“Give me a second. I need to get a calculator.”

Aku hanya memandang Khai dan abang Kamahl sementara menunggu Mr. Darshan kembali ke talian.

“Ok I am back. Let say it would be a three-years course, so AUD 25,000 times three would be AUD 75,000. And the current exchange rate is RM 3.20 to AUD 1.00. So AUD 75,000 times 3.2 would be, RM 240,000. Then, I am happy to say that we still have more than enough balance in the trust fund to pay the fees without using a single cent from your part of the inheritance.”

“Just how much money do we have inside the trust fund?”

“I am sorry Mr. Ezra, I can’t give you the details to that matter. However, it would be better for us to continue our conversation with regards to this matter and I will be glad to handle your transfer.”

“I am still thinking about this, I will get in contact with you again later when I made my mind.”

“No problem then. You can just give me a call and I will set an appointment for us to discuss further when you have made your mind.”

“Thank you.”

“You are welcome.”

Aku kemudian mematikan panggilan telefon.

“So, have you made your mind?”

“It doesn’t change anything abang. True, now I don’t have to worry about the fees. But still, it doesn’t change my mind.”

“Adek, abang tak tahu apa lagi yang harus abang katakan kepada adek. Abang tak tahu apa yang bermain di fikiran adek. Make me understand. Do you think long distance relationship is a simple matter? I know both of you, and I know you well enough adek. The only outcome from this is that you are going to suffer. So does Khai. You have been together for years and the prospect of you being almost 4000 KM apart is something unthinkable.”

“That’s is the reason abang. I have become too addicted to Khai’s presence. I am depending on Khai excessively. I am no longer a kid, and I should stop behaving like one. You know how much I missed you when you further your study to Warwick University after STPM. I was still a kid back then. I miss you so badly despite the fact that you always send me letters. But we made it. I managed to pull through. And I still have you right now. But, after all these years, I am beginning to get soft again. I lost my conviction, I again depend on you for too much. And I depend on Khai too. I need to get strong. I need to be able to stand on my own. I need to be able to face any difficulties ahead of me. I need to. Or else I wont be a better person. I will always be depending on anyone else, and I don’t want that to happen.”

Abang Kamahl hanya terdiam.

“Abang, even when Khai and Ezra are thousands of kilometres apart, I promise to myself and both of you, I will never abandone Ezra. I could never ever do that. As much as it pains me to say this, I know that both Ezra and I will be stronger after this. I want to be with him for all my life. And for that we need to be strong. Life won’t always be easy. I know that. This is a chance for us to make ourself better and stronger. I need to be better and stronger so that I could make Ezra happy.” Kata Khai kepada abang Kamahl.

“Please abang. Please understand.” Tambahku lagi.

Abang Kamahl kemudian bangun dan mengambil sebatang rokok ku yang terletak di atas meja lalu menyalakan nya. “Very well then.” Katanya lalu berlalu ke beranda. Khai lalu menggenggam erat tanganku. “Go, go to abang Kamahl. I know it is not easy for him to say yes.” Kata Khai kepadaku.

“Thanks by.”
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Aku dan Khai tiba di Perth International Airport pada 4.45 petang. Ketibaan kami di sambut oleh uncle Adam, yang merupakan penjaga Khai sedari kecil lagi. Sejak Khai meninggalkan Australia, rumah dan kereta kedua ibu bapa Khai di jaga dan diuruskan oleh uncle Adam. Menurut kata Khai, uncle Adam sudahpun berusia 65 tahun. Uncle Adam merupakan seorang warga negara Australia, dan sudah mula bekerja dengan papa Khai semenjak papa dan mama Khai kembali menetap di Perth.

Rumah Khai terletak di Beaconsfield yang berada lebih kurang 30 kilometer dari pusat bandaraya Perth. Khai yang di lahirkan di situ dan tinggal bersama papa dan mamanya sehingga kemalangan yang meragut nyawa papa, mama dan adik Khai ketika Khai berusia 5 tahun. Selepas peristiwa tersebut, Khai menghabiskan masa setahun di Malaysia di bawah jagaan nenek sebelum kembali ke Perth.

Kami melewati Christ the King School yang merupakan sekolah rendah Khai sebelum tiba di Dermer Road di mana terletaknya rumah Khai. Khai menghabiskan 3 tahun belajar di situ sebelum dia membuat keputusan untuk memasuki Cranbrook School yang terletak di Sydney. Dia memutuskan untuk tinggal di asrama sekolah yang disediakan.

Sedari tahun 4 sehingga tahun 10, Khai tinggal di sana dan hanya pulang ke Malaysia sewaktu cuti semester akhir tahun untuk menziarahi kubur papa, mama dan adiknya. Namun, disebabkan oleh kesihatan nenek yang agak tidak menentu di ketika itu, Khai kembali ke Malaysia dan bersekolah di salah sebuah sekolah di Kuala Lumpur. Tingkatan limanya di habiskan di Malaysia sebelum melanjutkan pelajaran kembali ke peringkat degree di Warwick University, Birmingham di mana disitulah menjadi titik perkenalan antara Khai dan abang Kamahl. Khai melanjutkan pelajarannya di bidang Computer and Management Sciences sementara abang Kamahl di dalam jurusan Mathematics and Physics.

Menurut kata abang Kamahl, pertemuan di antara abang Kamahl dan Khai terjadi di Birmingham Airport di mana mereka terpaksa berkongsi teksi untuk ke universiti. Ketika itu abang Kamahl sudah berada di tahun kedua sementara Khai masih lagi di tahun pertamanya.
Menurut abang Kamahl, sikap Khai yang pandai membawa diri dan fokus di dalam pelajaran membuatkan abang Kamahl senang berkawan dengannya. Seingat aku, di dalam surat-surat yang abang Kamahl utuskan kepadaku ada menyebut perihal beberapa pelajar Malaysia yang turut belajar di sana namun abang Kamahl tidak pernah menyebut berkenaan Khai di dalamnya.

“Sayang, jauh termenung tu.” Kata Khai tiba-tiba memecah lamunan ku.

“Sayang teringatkan cerita abang Kamahl masa dia berkenalan dengan by dulu.” Jawab ku sambil tersenyum.

“Oooo.”

“Kata abang Kamahl, dia senang berkawan dengan by.”

“By pun sama. By pun tak pernah sangka yang abang Kamahl dan by akan jadi rapat. Maklumlah, waktu itu abang Kamahl merupakan antara pelajar Malaysia yang menyerlah di sana. Di tambah lagi dengan kerja sambilan dia sebagai seorang model, memang by tidak menyangka yang abang Kamahl merupakan seorang yang peramah dan seorang yang baik. Kadang-kala dia ada bercerita tentang adiknya di Malaysia, dia sentiasa ceria pabila bercerita tentang adiknya. Tidak tahu pula by yang adik di maksudkannya adalah sayang.”

“Abang Kamahl pernah bercerita pasal Freddy?” tanya Khai lagi kepadaku.

“Freddy? Ex-boyfriend abang Kamahl masa dia study dulu tue? Fredrik *****berg?” balasku.

“Yup. Freddy. Waktu abang Kamahl dan Freddy berpisah, by ada pada waktu itu. Waktu itu by dan abang Kamahl sedang makan malam di sebuah restaurant, sebelum Freddy tiba bersama seorang wanita. Freddy kelihatan sangat mesra bersama wanita tersebut, namun abang Kamahl hanya memandang dari jauh. Dia tahu yang Freddy merupakan public figure dan sekiranya cerita bahawa abang Kamahl dan Freddy merupakan pasangan kekasih akan menjejaskan karier Freddy. Namun selepas beberapa ciuman yang abang Kamahl rasakan berlebihan dari Freddy kepada wanita tersebut membuatkan abang Kamahl tidak lagi mampu menahan perasaan. Dia pernah mendengar cerita akan perlakuan Freddy di belakangnya, namun baginya, itu hanya cerita. Namun, kini ia terbukti di hadapan mata. Abang Kamahl lantas menghampiri meja Freddy sebelum berbicara seketika. Mereka kemudian keluar sebentar dari restaurant. Entah apa yang di perkatakan. Tetapi, setelah hampir 15 minit, abang Kamahl kembali ke meja kami lalu membayar bil dan kami meninggalkan restaurant tersebut. Freddy hanya berdiri terkaku melihat abang Kamahl berlalu pergi.”

“Malam itu abang Kamahl tidak banyak berkata-kata. By cuba untuk menceriakan abang Kamahl, namun, tiada apa yang mampu untuk membuat abang Kamahl kembali tersenyum. Selepas seketika barulah abang Kamahl membuka mulut mengatakan yang Freddy merupakan kekasihnya dan mereka baru sahaja berpisah. Selepas itu dia terdiam sebelum masuk tidur.”

“Pada pagi kemudiannya, abang Kamahl bangun dan dia ceria seperti biasa. Seakan-akan tiada apa yang berlaku semalam. By pada mulanya ingatkan yang abang Kamahl cuba untuk menceriakan dirinya dengan berpura-pura bahawa tiada apa yang berlaku. Namun, lama kelamaan, by sedar yang abang Kamahl tidak selemah itu. Dia bangkit dari perasaan sedih dan kembali seperti sedia kala.”

“Wow, sayang tak tahu pasal ni. Abang Kamahl ada memberitahu di dalam suratnya yang dia sudah berpisah dengan Freddy, namun, dia tidak memberikan sebarang sebab kenapa.” Balasku.

“He is a strong guy. A great man with a great heart. Sayang bertuah sebab ada abang Kamahl dalam hidup sayang.”

“Yeah. We are lucky to have abang Kamahl.”

October 30, 2012

Dia - Dua Puluh Lapan


D
“Nanti petang nanti datang rumah. Suruh Khai datang sekali.” Sms dari abang Kamahl tiba seawal pukul 8.30 pagi. Herm, abang Kamahl tak bagitahu pulak kenapa dia suruh aku datang. Well, tak payah fikir panjang la kan, nie mesti sebab aku tak ikut Khai la nie. Sigh. Aper-aper pun, I’ve talk to Khai about this, and we agreed to settle it just the way I think would do best, kan. Now, we just need to mengadap abang Kamahl, dan yakinkan dia that this will work.

“Knock knock knock. Are you awake dude?” Joe muncul, dengan tangan kanannya masih lagi memegang tombol pintu bilikku.

“Yeah, what’s up?” tanyaku kepada Joe.

“I was thinking about going to AmCorp, I nak usha model transformer baru. But before that, you might want to, you know, cover yourself up. That erection makes me thinking about the great time we had together. And I don’t want to make you cheat on Khai, though. He’ll kill me for that.” Balas Joe lagi sambil tersengih-sengih.

“Owh, sorry.” Aku cepat-cepat bangun dari katil dan mencapai seluar dalamku untuk di pakai. “Maybe next time, you should knock, and wait for my response , before you open the door.” Kataku lagi selepas memakai seluar dalam.

“Awwww, malu ker babe?”

“Hahahaha. Sengal, bukan pasal malu la. You’ve seen a lot kan, well, don’t tell Khai about that. What I mean is, this time you’re lucky to just watching me naked, next time, who knows, Khai will be around, and you saw what was meant for me, then I’ll be sorry to pluck out your eyes dude.”

“Ouch. Ok. Point taken. I’ll knock and wait. So, AmCorp?”

“Sure. Vincent ngan Hisyam?”

“Dorang tak ikut, dorang ader hal katenyer. So, kita berdua je la.”

“Ok, erm, baru pukul 8.30 nie, in an hour then?”

“Yup, in an hour.”

“Ok now get out, I need to call my baby.”

“Sure sure.” Balas Joe lagi lalu beredar dari bilikku. Sebelum itu sempat lagi dia menepuk punggungku. Sengal Joe. Sejak parti barbeque beberapa tahun lepas di rumah Khai, aku dan Joe tidak lagi mengadakan hubungan sex. We both know our boundaries and we both respect that. Well, I’m glad that Joe is not pushing the limit, and I can control myself. Cuma, kadang-kadang tue, Joe suka tepuk punggungku, macam tadi.

Sejak isi hatiku dan Khai di ketahui oleh satu sama lain, aku tidak lagi mengadakan hubungan sex dengan orang lain, termasuk beberapa partner sex ku seperti Figo, Alex, Zoul, dan yang lain-lain. Kebanyakan mereka dapat menerima dan tidak lagi mengajakku untuk mengadakan hubungan sex. Tapi kami masih lagi berhubungan, sekadar berkawan. Namun ada juga yang tak faham-faham bahasa, ader jer yang nak kacau la, ajak main lagi la. Lepas kena maki 2 3 kali baru faham. Bukannya aku cakap bahasa jawa ke aper ker. Susah betul. Well at least dorang takde la sampai kacau sepanjang masa kan, so Khai tak tahu la, kalau tak mau dia pergi cari pulak diorang. Tak pasal-pasal jadi kes besar pulak nanti. Somehow, I’m thinking about telling him about all these ex-scandal pestering me, but, then again, I think it’s better for me to settle it by myself, plus, there’s only one or two of them who have been bugging me like hell.

Kadang-kadang pernah la jugak kepalaku terbayangkan akan semua pengalaman sex ku bersama orang lain, tapi, I’ll end up calling Khai and be with him. It put a stop to my wild fantasy, so, ok la kan. Huhuhu. For me, being monogamous is not hard, we just have to know how to control ourselves and when we can’t do anything about it, get help. And Khai is my saviour. I love him.

Bagi Khai pula, aku sedia maklum yang dia tidak pernah bersama dengan orang lain selain diriku. Walaupun kadang-kala aku merasakan yang dia mampu untuk mendapatkan yang lebih baik dariku, tapi aku bertuah dan bersyukur kerana dia bersamaku. Entah apa yang aku lakukan sekiranya aku tidak bersama dengan Khai.

Kadang-kala aku perasan pabila kami keluar bersama, akan ada mata-mata yang memandang Khai dengan penuh minat dan tidak kurang juga ada yang memulakan langkah. Namun, seperti episod Tasha, Khai bijak untuk menangkis sebarang percubaan tersebut dalam cara yang membuatkan aku sedar akan entah untuk kesekian kalinya, Khai milikku dan aku miliknya. Itu tidak pernah walau sesaat aku ragui.

Sepanjang bertahun kami bersama, hidupku penuh dengan detik-detik manis. Pernah lah jugak pabila kami berselisihan faham, tapi, biasanya hanya di sebabkan perkara kecil, seperti siapa yang patut mengalah dalam membayar sesuatu, apabila Khai bertegas untuk aku menghabiskan assignment sebelum kami menghabiskan masa bersama dan sebagainya.

Sungguhpun Khai ingin menghabiskan sepenuh masanya bersamaku, dia tidak pernah mengabaikan pelajaranku pabila kami bersama. Kadang-kadang pernah la jugak di mana aku mahu untuk bermalas-malas sedikit sewaktu mengulang kaji, tapi, Khai akan memastikan segalanya selesai sebelum aku boleh bermalas. Sigh, tak sabar pulak aku nak habis belajar macam nie.

****************************************************************************************************
Aku dan Joe menuju ke sebuah restoran Korea yang terletak di Mid Valley selepas kami selesai membeli beberapa barang di AmCorp Mall. Joe membeli 2 model transformer sementara aku membeli beberapa buah buku baru dari Book Axcess. Aku turut membelikan sekeping CD Alicia Keys untuk Khai.

“Babe, don’t you wanna get settle down?” tanyaku kepada Joe sedang kami menuju pulang ke rumah.

“Settle down?”

“Yer la, get a girlfriend.”

“Herm.” Balas Joe pendek, kemudian dia terdiam.

“It’s a yes or no question. What took you so long? Or you want me to change it into a “get a boyfriend?”” tambah ku lagi.

Joe yang sedang memandu ketika itu mengalihkan perhatian kepadaku buat seketika dengan pandangan matanya yang kurasakan seperti, lost, sebelum dia kembali meneruskan pemanduan. Kuku jarinya di gigit perlahan.

“Are you?” tanyaku lagi, setelah dapat mengagak apa yang bermain di fikiran Joe waktu ini.

Joe masih lagi tidak menjawab. Dia masih lagi menggigit kukunya. “I think I’m bi.” Tambah Joe lagi selepas itu.

“Cool.” Jawabku. “Huhuhuhu. I always know that you are bisex. If you’re damn straight, why the hell did you ever fuck me like crazy. But, are you sure? Or, is this just a little confusion?”

“I am confuse la babe. Till now, you are the only guy who I’ve ever been with. And I’ve been with a lot of girls, a lot. And I thought, at that time, I was just the kind of guy who didn’t mind having sex with another guy. Plus, I’ve got to know you for a long time and I enjoy being with you and be your friends. But, when you are with Khai, when I saw you guys together, I felt something in my heart. I felt jealous. Not that jealous that you are with someone else. But, I’m jealous that I have no man in my life, just like you.”

“But you have girls all over you. What’s the big fuss about not having a man of your life?”

“I know I know. But, this is different. I think I’m done with girls. Not for lust, thought. I still have those lust for girls, and I do get my stick erected when I watch straight porn. Not that I ever watch gay porn thought. But, yeah, I’ve given all this thing a very deep thought. As much as I still enjoy having sex with girls, I need a man in my life.”

“Welcome to the Gay Brotherhood, brother. Hahahaha.”

“Hahahahaha. This is serious babe. God! I never thought that I’m going to have this conversation with you.”

“What’s wrong with having it with me? I’m gay, I’m attached to an angel from heaven, and I’m your best friend. So, do you need any other reason on why you should have this talk with me? The answer is NO. I can’t wait to see Khai’s and abang Kamahl’s reactions when I told them about this. Owh ya, Vincent and Hisyam too.”

“Wow wow wow. Hold on a second man. I think Khai and abang Kamahl are fine. They’ve been in the field for a very long time, well, not for Khai la kan. But still. as much as Vincent and Hisyam are ok with you being gay all over your head with Khai and abang Kamahl, but still, having another guy-loving guy within our circle, is something that I’m not sure whether they are ok with that. So, spare me for the moment, and I’ll tell them when I think the time is right.”

“But make sure you’ll tell them, they will kill me for knowing this thing and not keeping them within the circle.”

“Ok ok. I got the idea. Don’t worry about that. They don’t want to get shredded by abang Kamahl and Khai for even detaching a strand of your hair. So, don’t worry about that.”

“Don’t worry la dude. I’ll talk to them as smooth as I can. So, tell me, which one of us is your type? Me? Khai? Or Abang Kamahl?”

“What is with your question? And why do you have to use Abang Kamahl, Khai and you yourself as an example?”

“Hahahaha. I take that you like abang Kamahl, then.” Balasku lagi.

“Erk. What makes you think that I’m into abang Kamahl and sort of like him?”

“Well, you mention him first, althought that when I asked you, I said, “Me, Khai or abang Kamahl?” Not abang Kamahl first.”

“So that doesn’t mean that I’m into abang Kamahl, don’t start speculating.”

“Awww, come on, I’m just curious. Huhuhu, I’ve seen you with your girls, and the only guy who I knew have been with you is me, so, I’m dying to know, what is your type.”

“Dimwit, I had sex with you not only because I’m open about having sex with guys and I know you very well, it’s damn obvious that you are my type. Well, maybe I don’t know that from the start la kan, but then again, what else could be the reason?”

“Someone like me? Could you explain that phrase?”

“Owh no. I’m not going to do that. You go figure that out yourself.”

“Awww man. I’m just curious.”

“Well then, curiousity kills the cat, so just figure that out yourself, and don’t get killed. Hahaha.”

“Ok ok. So, what do you think about abang Kamahl?”

“Well, he’s a nice guy. Nice body and good looking too. But, I don’t think I’m into him. Not that he’s not my type though, just that I think, he could be difficult to me.”

“Difficult? Explain. I don’t like the way you describe him, so you better have a good explanation for that.”

“Wuoh wuoh! Chill man. I’m saying that he could be difficult to me because he has you. What I’m trying to say is that, I don’t need a guy who has someone else.”

“But you are a guy who share your love with all the girls. So, aren’t you being selfish, for asking someone who’s not like you?”

“Can’t I just hope that one day I’ll find a guy like that? Can I?”

“Yes you can la. But my advice is, if you are looking for a real relationship, be it a straight one, or a gay one, stick to the monogamous part. It’s a relationship we are talking about, not just fling and all that ok.”

“Yer la. Can I ask you one thing?”

“Yeah, sure. What do you want to ask about?”

“Is Khai really your first boyfriend? I mean, you’re hot, smart and a good guy. And you are very open about your sexuality. It is kind of surprising for you to be in a relationship for the first time.”

“Yeah. I had scandals before, tonnes of it. But that was all for fun.”

“You never fall for a guy before?”

“I did, I have to admit on that. But I wont call it love. It was more like, affection.”

“What happened?”

“He was a good friend of mine back in boarding school. We were in the same archery club. You could say that we were a pair back then, since we were always in the same team. And, coincidentally we’re sharing the same dorm for 2 years. Not surprisingly when we did few quickly then too. But, at that time, I was still young. And I was so close to abang Kamahl. Relationship had never crossed my mind back then. I have abang Kamahl, I love him as my brother and that was enough. Truly having another guy in my life back then was unthinkable.”

“Then?”

“You knew that I was transferred to another school after PMR. And nobody knew about it, even me myself. Mom did that. But I remember before the school break, I gave him my home phone number. No call from him at all. Even after I moved to another school. I waited and waited. Nothing. We already moved back to KL that time, so I have no means to visit my friends back at Ipoh.

Then, I stop thinking about him. Until our foundation year.”

“Foundation? Why?”

“You know him. Well, you might still remember him. It was Hafiz.”

“Hafiz?”

“He transferred to a different university after second semester of foundation year.”

“That Hafiz who was in the rugby team? It was him? Are you kidding me? How could I never knew any of this?”

“Because it was all just a memory. And yeah, Hafiz from the rugby team.”

“So, anything happened after that? I mean after you met him back then?”

“We went out together few times. Just for a drinks, talking and reminiscing the school life. But that was it. Nothing more. We never talked about how close we were back then, or about the quicky thing. Nothing. We were just friends. But, not like before, we were no longer close like back then.”

“Then I realized what I felt back then was just affection. Perhaps to fill in the gap in my nights that abang Kamahl left since he further his study to UK after STPM. But it was just the bodily affection. Nothing more.”

Dia - Dua Puluh Tujuh


D
“Sayang, by ingat by nak sambung master la. What do you think about that?” kata Khai setelah menghabiskan dinnernya.

“Bagus la macam tue. Sayang sokong. By nak sambung master amik aper? Dekat maner?”

“By ingat nak ambil Networking Security, or things like that la. Tempat, by tak survey lagi. By ingat nak bincang dengan sayang dulu.”

“Ooook. Sayang memang support la keputusan by nak sambung belajar. Pasal dekat maner pulak, nanti sayang tolong by cari ok.”

“Ok sayang.”

Setelah habis makan di sebuah restoran di Bangsar, kami kemudian bergerak ke Skybar yang terletak berdekatan dengan KLCC untuk minum-minum. Hari ini merupakan Sabtu malam, dan sepanjang minggu tu merupakan minggu yang sungguh sibuk bagiku. Begitu juga dengan Khai. Jadi, kami hanya mahu melepak-lepak sambil menikmati minuman di Skybar.

Kami tiba di Skybar pada pukul 9.30 malam setelah membuat reservation dan duduk di sofa yang di sediakan. Setelah memesan minuman, kami hanya melepak-lepak menikmati keindahan malam.


Suasana agak gamat kurasakan kerana di seberang pool berhadapan kami, terdapat sekumpulan gadis-gadis muda yang sedang berseronok. Khai hanya berbaring di sofa dengan kepalanya di pehaku, sambil membaca buku yang di sediakan di situ.

“Dah lamakan by kita tak lepak-lepak minum macam nie.” Kataku kepada Khai.

“Yup. Sayang pun dah lama tak pergi clubbing dengan Joe semuakan?”

“Aaah. Huhuhu. Dorang tak bising?”

“Ala, dorang tau dah yang sayang dah kawin dua tahun dah. Dorang paham.”

“Hahahaha. Ok ok. Ala, kalau dorang ajak, sayang nak ikut, ikut la. By tak kesah.”

“Hehehe. Tapi by kena la ikut sekali, baru best.”

“Ok.”

Kemudian Chuck, salah seorang pelayan di Skybar sampai bersama minuman kami. Aku dan Chuck sudah lama berkenalan ekoran aku selalu ke sini.

“Hye babe. How’s work?”

“Macam nie je la dude. You sejak dah kahwin nie, jarang kan datang dah.”

“Hahaha. Yer la, dah kawin, kena la spend masa dengan husband I, betul tak by?”

“Yer. Tau takpa. Hahaha.” Balas Khai yang sudahpun bangun dan duduk untuk minum.

“Saper tue Chuck?” tanyaku sambil menunjukkan kepada kumpulan gadis di hadapan.

“Owh, I pun tak pasti. Maybe ini first time diorang kot. I’ve never seen any one of them here la.”

“Oook.” Aku baru saja ingin bertanyakan soalan lain kepada Chuck sebelum muncul seorang gadis muda berdiri di sebelah Chuck lantas berdehem sedikit.

“Yes?” tanyaku kepada gadis tadi. Kurasakan gadis itu datang dari kumpulan gadis di seberang pool. Kelihatan juga beberapa temannya yang memandang-mandang kearah kami dengan penuh senyuman. Berdiri pada 5 kaki 6 inci, bersama-sama dengan high heels, skirt yang nampak menarik, tapi pasti lebih menarik di pakai oleh orang lain. Kelihatan gadis yang berdiri di depan kami cuba untuk memberikan beberapa pose menggoda sambil menunjukkankan kegedikannya. A-cup. Yup. A-cup. Itu telahan aku terhadap saiz buah dadanya. Overall, cute tapi gedik.

Gadis tadi memandang aku atas dan bawah tanpa sebarang minat dan kemudian tanpa menghiraukan aku dan Chuck, dia lantas menghulurkan tangan ke arah Khai sebelum bersuara dengan penuh gedik, “Hye, I Tasha. I’m wondering whether you would like to join us for a little chat, or maybe we can have a drink together.” Tambah gadis itu lagi. Wah! Nie dah lebih nie, nak menggatal dengan laki aku depan aku pulak. Dah lah tak lawa, nampak budak-budak lagi, gedik pulak tue. Cibai jer kan. Aku yang mula menyirap melihatkan seorang perempuan bitch cuba untuk memikat Khai tiba-tiba mengalih perhatian pabila terdengar gelak tawa Khai. Seolah-olah ada sesuatu yang melucukan hatinya.

“Naper nie by?” tanyaku kepada Khai. Aku sengaja memegang tangan Khai sambil pipinya ku pegang dengan telapak tanganku. Biar si Tasha bitch tue makan hati.

“Huhuhu, takde aper-aper sayang.” Kata Khai. Dia kemudian berpaling ke arah Tasha, dan sambil menahan gelaknya, Khai kemudian menambah, “Sorry Tasha. I’m married with him. And I don’t do girls, even if I’m single. Huhuhu. And owh ya, you might want to go now, as my husband could get very, very jealous. Kan sayang” Khai mengangkat tangan kami yang bertaut lantas menunjukkan sepasang cincin yang tersemat di jari kami. Dia lantas mencium tanganku lembut di hadapan Chuck dan Tasha.

Terdengar Chuck cuba untuk menahan gelak tawanya. Tasha kelihatan sungguh malu dan marah, dan apabila Chuck tidak dapat menahan gelak tawanya, Tasha terus pergi dari situ. Aku dan Khai kemudian turut sama bergelak tawa.

“Lucky you dude, dapat Khai. Kalau la I, dah tentu dah I join si Tasha tue. Lawa siot. Cuma gedik sikit jer. Tapi takpe. I’ll tap that ass.”

“Hahahaha. This is Khai, not you.”

“Hehehe.” Gelak Khai lagi.

“Ok lah, enjoy your drinks, I nak sambung kerja lagi. Lepas nie, definitely Tasha tak datang sini dah.” Kata Chuck.

“Hahaha. Tau takper.” Tambah Khai.

Chuck kemudian berlalu pergi meninggal kami.

“Now, it seems like, you have a very beautiful bitch interested in you.” Kataku kepada Khai.

“Awww. Sayang jealous yek.”

“A bit.”

“A bit jer?”

“A bit jer.” Balasku lagi. A bit? Takde maknanya a bit. Mesti la aku jealous dan tak suka.

“Betul? A bit jer?” tanya Khai lagi kepadaku.

“Ye la ye la. Banyak. Herm, selamba je bitch tuekan. Rasa nak jer kiss baby tadi depan-depan dia biar dia sedar by milik sayang.” Kataku dengan sedikit nada marah.

Kemudian tiba-tiba Khai mencium aku di bibir, lama dan dia bermain lidahku dengan lidahnya. Aku kembali normal seperti biasa, melupakan si Tasha bitch.

“Kiss me like that?” tanya Khai lagi sambil tersenyum dan tangannya menyentuh lembut mukaku.

“Just like that by.” Kataku, lalu Khai kembali di dalam dakapanku sambil bibir kami bertautan.

****************************************************************************************************
“By dah fikirkan mana by nak apply untuk sambung master?”

“Erm, I’m thinking about UM, and UIAM, close, and yet, great Master programs.”

“Ok. What about other University? Out of Malaysia?”

“Abroad? Herm, well, never thought about that. But, I don’t think it’s a problem to apply for it, kan.”

“Yup, I’ve seen your grades, and we both know that you can afford it.” Tambahku lagi. “By, do you miss them?” tiba-tiba aku menukar tajuk perbualan kami.

“Them?”

“Mama, papa dan adek by.”

“Although that I only have 5 years together with mama and papa, and only a brief moment with adek, I know that I always love them and I always miss them. Kenapa tiba-tiba tanya?”

“When was the last time you went back to Perth? To your home?”

“By. By dah lama tak balik sana.”

“By tak nak balik?”

“Kenapa tiba-tiba tanya soalan macam nie?” balas Khai.

“Erm, I want you to apply to Murdoch University, Perth.”

“Huh? Murdoch?”
“Yes. This is the print out yang sayang dah print dari page diorang. Ada beberapa course yang sayang rasa sesuai, Network Management and Security.”

“What? Are you sending me away?” tanya Khai seakan tidak percaya akan cadangan ku itu. Aku tidak mengambil pusing akan apa yang di katakan oleh Khai. Aku terus menunjukkan kertas yang ku print kepada Khai. Aku tidak berani untuk memandang matanya. “Ader mid-year intake, dateline July 23rd, 2 years course, by cuma boleh ambil sepenuh masa. Lagi pulak I think the place would be.....”

“Hye hye hye. Sayang. Look at me. What are you doing? Why Murdoch? Why you really want to go there?” tanya Khai sambil kedua telapak tangannya di pipiku, aku di pusing agar memandangnya.

Aku tetap tidak memandang wajahnya. Pandanganku ku matikan di kertas yang ku pegang itu. Aku terus terusan membaca.

“You hate me? Is that it?” tanya Khai. Suaranya kedengaran begitu sedih sekali. Aku yang tidak mampu lagi melarikan pandangan matanya, kini memandang sayu wajahnya.

“No. Not like that. I love you, and you know that sayang.” Kataku perlahan.

“Then, what are you doing?”

“Sayang cuma rasa yang course ni fits you, that’s all.”

“You really want me to apply this?” tanya Khai, lemah.

“Yes” hanya itu jawapanku.

“Then you are going with me. I’ll handle everything. I’ll get you transfered, don’t you worry about it. Even if your inheritence wouldn’t cover for it, I’ll take care of it. You will come with me, right?”

Aku tidak menjawab. Aku hanya tersenyum, walaupun dalam hatiku, aku tahu, aku bersedih.

***************************************************************************************************
“Hye abang. Abang busy? Can we talk?” sms ku kepada abang Kamahl.

Handphone ku kemudian berbunyi, panggilan dari abang Kamahl. Aku yang sewaktu itu di rumah sewaku, berlari masuk ke dalam bilikku.

“Naper adek? Nak cakap aper?”

“Erm, Khai ader cakap aper-aper dengan abang tak?”

“Nie pasal dia nak sambung study tue ker? Aaa, abang tau. Adek pun ikut sekalikan?”

“Erm. Adek, adek tak pergi.”

“Huh? I thought Khai cakap dengan abang, dia akan uruskan hal pertukaran adek? Wait, don’t tell me, you are not going, and Khai doesn’t knows? Are you stupid?”

“Abang!”

“What? Adek nak marah abang panggil adek stupid? Kenapa adek tak nak pergi? Bagitahu dekat abang.”

“Adek, adek memang nak pergi. Tapi, adek nak pegi dengan usaha adek sendiri. Bukan dengan bantuan Khai, bukan dengan bantuan harta warisan tue.”

“Owh adek, step aside you ego, will you?”

“This is not about ego abang! This is about my life. My whole life.”

“I don’t understand. Khai is your whole life. What life are you talking about nie?”

“Memang la, Khai adalah hidup adek. Tapi, ini masa depan adek. Adek nak usaha sendiri.”

“You know that this is not a solid argument kan?”

“I know. Tapi...”

“Adek, selama nie, abang cuba untuk tak campur tangan sangat dalam keputusan adek. Tapi, you are being ego, and stupid too. You can have your future too, there. With him. I want you to reconsider all this, give a very deep thought. Please. You don’t have the real idea on what are you about to do right now.”

“I don’t know, abang. I’m afraid.”

“Afraid of what? Tadi adek cakap adek nak tentukan sendiri your future. Now you are telling me that you are afraid? Mana satu nie?”

“I’m afraid of everything abang. I’m afraid about my future, I’m afraid about our life. I’m afraid.”

“I just don’t get it, adek. You sounded like you’re doubting yourself, like you’re doubting Khai. Can you please, please, stop being stupid? Ok, kalau adek takut sangat, kenapa adek minta Khai apply ke Australia? Kat Malaysia banyak lagi universiti kan? Khai bagitahu abang dia plan nak apply ke UM, sebelum adek suruh dia apply untuk universiti dekat Perth tue. Then kenapa tak support je, suruh je dia study sini. Korang masih boleh bersamakan.”

“That’s because he longed to be there. He wanted to be at home, at the place where he grew up. Where all the memories he had with his family, he wanted to be there.”

“He told you that?”

“You know for sure that he’ll never tell me anything about it. Because if I know, then I’ll definitely asked him to go home. To go there. And you know for damn sure that he won’t be there without me.”

“How, how did you know about all this? About him longing to be home?”

“Minggu lepas Khai bawak adek ziarah kubur mama, papa dan adek Khai. Adek nampak, Khai sedih dan rindukan diorang. Malam tue, Khai mula mengigau. Dia sebut pasal mama, papa dia. Dia cakap dia rindukan adek dia. Dia minta maaf dekat dorang sebab dia tak dapat balik ke rumah. Adek tak cakap aper-aper dekat Khai. Adek tak nak Khai sedih. Tapi, lepas tue, tiap-tiap malam dia akan mengigau benda yang sama. I don’t want him to be sad, abang.”

“But you are going to make him sad, you are going to crush him, when you’re not there with him. When you are not going to be with him, for at least a couple of years.”

“Abang, ...”

“Adek, I can accept the reason why you want him to go to Perth. But I definitely can’t accept the fact that you are not going too just because you claim to be afraid and because of your ego and stupidity. You are just being plain stupid, adek. You have the grades for it. You have the money, although that the inheritence wouldn’t help much when you convert it to Australian dollar, but still, you have Khai. He will pay it all. You know he would. And you have me, I will help you with it if you want me to.”

“No, abang. I won’t do that. I won’t let him pays for everything.”

“Snap it out, will you? Stop being an oxymoron. Stop being selfish. Stop being ego. I’ve got to know you for a long time. And I know that money has never been a problem to you. And we both know how much you hate when others spend money on you. But, can you at least, put that aside, for at least few years. If you want, you can pay him back. You can do that if that will ease your mind, though I’m sure Khai wouldn’t want you to pay him back. Adek, can’t you see? You are going to do something that you are going to regret for your life, for at least till he is back. If you love him, if you really care for him, show it. But not like this. This is not love at all. This is plain stupidity.”

“I’ve made up my mind abang.”

“And I really hope that you will seriously consider this thing thouroughly. Please. Sigh, adek, adek. When are you going to tell him about this?”

“I don’t know. I think, when the right time comes.”

“Will there be a right time?”

“Entah lah. But I will tell him, soon.”

“Owh lord! How I wish I’m not listening to you doing this, this stupid plan of yours. Seeing you cry over all this stupid mistake is definitely not a pleasent thing to, and even worst to Khai when he knows that you are crying when you miss him. I just have no words left to say to you.”

****************************************************************************************************
“By, sayang tak dapat pergi dengan by. Sayang tak dapat ikut by.” Tanganku yang sedikit menggeletar menggenggam erat tangan Khai. Khai tidak bergerak. Kami terdiam seketika di sofa.

Entah kenapa Khai menutupkan matanya, aku tak pasti untuk beberapa lamanya, aku hanya mampu mendiamkan diriku.

“As much as I know that from the very moment you mentioned about Perth, I just can’t keep my dissapointment. I’m sorry.” Mata Khai masih lagi tertutup. Genggaman tangannya masih lagi bersamaku.

“Are you trying to be cynical? Sorry? Sorry? Are you kidding me? I’m the one who’s suppose to say that? I am! Aren’t you mad with me?” aku seolah-olah tidak percaya yang Khai meminta maaf diatas apa yang aku katakan sebentar tadi. Aku pasti aku tidak berkhayal, aku sedang high ketika ini.

“Why should I? I love you. I won’t force you to do something you don’t want to do. Yes. I want you to come with me. I want you to be there with me. I want to be with you. But, as much as I love you, you know that I will never, ever force you to do something. I want you to do it because you want to. We will think of something, ok? I know it’s going to be hard. With all this long-distance relationship. You are here, and me, thousand kilometres away. We’ll make it work ok. I promise you. I promise you even that my body will be there, my heart and my soul will forever be in this very land. Simply because you have stole that from me a long time ago. Would you promise me that you would keep it safe? Forever?”

“Why can’t you get mad with me? I would accept that much better, having you get all mad with me. That is expected. That was what supposed to happen. But not this.”

“Sayang, here, listen to me.” Khai perlahan memegang kedua-dua belah pipiku, seperti yang dia selalu lakukan bila cuba untuk meyakinkan ku dan memujuk ku. “Have you ever seen me get mad with you? I never did that and I will never start to do so. Now, would you promise me that you will keep my heart and my soul with you?”

“Promise me that after two years you would come back. And promise me that you would be with me, every semester break. Promise me to call when you are about to sleep. Promise me to only dream of me every night. Promise me that you would only love me. Because I could never stop loving you, even with thousand kilometres keeping us a part.”

“Sayang, I promise you that I will come back after two years. I promise you I would be with you, the love of my live every semester break. I promise to call you when I am about to sleep as I promise you by the time you hit your healing and deep slumber, I will come to you, like I always did. I’ll snuck into your comforter, I’ll kiss you all over you, over and over again. I promise you that I will only love you, as I have been doing for the past 27 years of my life.”

“Your heart and soul will forever be with me, by.”

“Thanks sayang. Now, would you smile, at least for me? You have been moody all night. You are cute when you’re moody, but you look even cuter when you are smiling. And you know how it hurts me not seeing you smile?” kata Khai lantas memicit perlahan batang hidungku.

“Huhuhu.”

“Now, tell me, why Perth? Why wouldn’t it be Sydney, Waitangi, or even UM? Why Murdoch? I’m puzzled.”

“Awww. Do I need to say that? You know the reason, kan?”

“Am I?”

“Yer la. Mesti la by tau kenapa.”

“Serius, by tak tau kenapa. Cakap la. Kenapa tak UM? Dekat jer? Kalau nak jauh supaya sayang selalu rindukan by, USM dah cukup jauh dah.”

“Adeyh by, USM dekat Penang jer. Sejam jer naik kapal terbang. Plus, it’s not about dekat ke jauh la, by. And, tak kesah la jauh ke dekat ke, sayang selalu rindukan by. Even bila sayang dalam pelukan by pun, I always miss you.”

“Ok. Then, what is it all about? Would you tell me? Please?” Khai memandangku dengan matanya yang dikuyukan sedikit. Dengan tangannya kembali ke pipiku. Awww. Cair betul aku bila baby ku buat macam nie. Tak adil betul.

“Awww. Stop giving me that look. You know I won’t be able to say no to that?” kataku kepada Khai lagi. Dia masih lagi memandangku dengan mata kuyunya. Khai memang la tak sepet atau bermata kuyu, tapi, kadang-kadang dia tak sedar yang dia buat macam tue, terutama bila tengah memujuk. Haih.

“What look?”

“Lagi nak tanyakan! Your eyes la. Your puppy eyes. Damn, you are so good in making me say something kan.”

“Huhuhu. Sorry, tak perasan pulak pasal tue. Now, tell me, please.”

“Sigh. You really are trying to pull my leg, kan by. I know that you miss your mama, papa and adek. You said your sorry to them for not being able to be home. Your parent’s home, back in Perth. You told me.”

“Huh? I did? I told you all that? When?” muka Khai berkerut, tentunya dia memikirkan bila semua itu di beritahu kepadaku.

“Well, you did tell me about it. Well, not technically though. You were sleep-talking, by.”

“Owh. When?”

“You first sleep talking the night after we went to their graves. Then the night after that. And night after that, and the night after. And you stop the night when I told you to go to Perth. Well, I’m glad that I did, not because you’re disturbing my sleep, but, simply because I know you are glad to be home.”

“And your way of asking me to go home and remedy my sickness, is by sending me back for 2 years, all alone?”

“All alone, so that you can take your time. And by the time you are back for good, you have no regrets and no longer feel sorry about not be able to come home.”

“What if, after that I’m feeling home sick again?”

“Then, it will be my pleasure to be there with you. With all my heart.”

“Thank you. I love you for your love. And I always love you, even when you are not doing a thing. Thank you sayang.”

“Don’t mention it. Be happy ok. You’re going home. But before that, you’ll need to fill in the application. TOEFL, visa and everything, we’ll go through together, ok?”

“Ok. But I don’t need a visa. I’m a resident of Australia Though I have to check whether I have PR status have been revoke or need to apply for Resident Return Visa since I have been away for almost 3 years.”


“Nice. Even better that way.”

“Now, there will be things that I need to settle down. I’ll try to settle it up as soon as possible ok, then we can stop talking about all this. I don’t want you to think about all this anymore. That might hurt you. And about our home in Ampang, don't worry. We will keep it, and I’ll arrange the installment payment, ok. Now, smile for me, please.”

“I don’t want to.” Kataku, sedikit manja-manja. Huhuhu.

“Herm, what should I do to make you smile, my love? This?” kata Khai lalu mencium bibirku. 

“Or this?” kemudian dia menuruti tulang rahangku dengan hidungnya, sambil perlahan dia menghembus nafas, “Or should I do this?” Khai memasukkan tangannya ke dalam bajuku, lalu dadaku di ramas mesra sambil dia mencium lembut keseluruhan tengkukku. “Maybe this, then.” Kata Khai sambil membuka 2 butang teratas baju yang di pakainya.

“I want it all, with more action on the last choice.” Balasku lagi.

“You are one greedy husband. Hahaha. Well, greedy is good huh, when I’m all yours.” Tambah Khai sambil tersenyum simpul. “Should I make it naughty and raunchy? Grrr... or should I make it sweet and romantic?”

“Both. Huhuhu. You asked me, right.”

Khai memusingkan matanya atas dan ke bawah, dan dengan nada bergurau, dia mengeluh. Dia lantas membuka jam tangannya dan di letakkan di atas meja. “Let’s play a game.”

“Hehehe. I love games.”

“Close your eyes and count till 30. Look out for my trail. You’ll get a present at the end of the search, for the starter, my watch. And, when you found something, take something off from yourself. It will be fun at the end of the game, right?”

Aku terus menutup mataku dan mula mengira dengan suara yang kuat.

“1, 2, 3, ....... 26, 27, 28, baby time’s almost up, 29,30. I’m coming, ready.”

Jam tangan Khai masih lagi di atas meja, aku lalu melihat-lihat ke sekeliling ruang tamu untuk mencari sebarang barang atau pakaian yang mungkin di letakkan di tempat yang tidak sepatutnya. Kemudian aku terjumpa tali pinggang Khai di dapur. Herm, nampaknye baby masuk dapur, tapi kat mana ye by sekarang. Aku keluar dari dapur. Tali leher yang di pakai Khai pagi ini, tali leher slim, warna hitam kehijauan di letakkan di kaki tangga. Aku lalu menaiki tangga tersebut, dan di penghujung tangga, seluar Khai di atas lantai. Dan setiap kali aku menjumpai sesuatu, aku membuka pakaianku sehelai. Aku lantas mencari-cari di sekeliling tingkat atas. Tiada lagi sebarang petanda yang kelihatan. Dan di saat ini, aku sudah menanggalkan kesemua pakaianku. Aku kemudian menuju ke salah satu bilik yang jarang di gunakan, sebelum pandanganku terlihat akan baju kemeja Khai tergantung di tombol pintu biliknya. Kemeja tersebut ku ambil, dan ku rapatkan ke mukaku. Bau Khai masuk keseluruh tubuhku, menyegarkan seluruh inci tubuh badanku dan membuatkan jantungku mengepam lagu darah keseluruh tubuhku. Kemeja itu kemudian ku pakaikan ke badanku. Kehangatan baju tersebut terasa seolah pelukan Khai, cuma, dalam skala yang lebih kecil.

Aku kemudian menggengam tombol pintu tersebut, sebelum mula memusingkannya perlahan, lantas, pintu itu ku bukakan. Kelihatan Khai sedang berbaring di atas katilnya, dengan kedua tanganya di bawah kepalanya, hanya memakai seluar dalam putihnya. Dia tersenyum melihatku.

“Found you, by.”

“Hehehe. What took you so long?”

“Well, I like to take my time.”

“Huhuhu. Ok sayang. Now you have found me, would you mind taking my underwear off?”

Aku bergerak ke arah katil, dan Khai hanya memerhatikan pergerakanku. Aku yang hanya memakai kemeja Khai, kemudian naik ke atas, dan mula mencium bibir Khai. Khai membalas ciumanku dengan penuh ghairah lantas dia memelukku dan menarikku agar aku berbaring di atas badannya. Aku terus terusan mencium Khai, sambil tangan Khai meramas-ramas badanku dan punggungku.

Aku yang masih lagi mencium Khai kemudian menaikkan badanku sedikit dengan disokong dengan tangan kiriku sebelum aku membuka butang baju yang ku pakai itu dengan tangan kananku. Aku bingkas bangun sebentar untuk membuka baju tersebut dan ku campakkan ke tepi.

Khai kemudian ku cium di seluruh badannya. Setiap kali bibirku menyentuh badannya, Khai bernafas dengan lebih pantas dan mengerang lembut. Tiada lagi sebarang kata yang terungkap malam itu. I love you.